Stupid scams

Been getting a lot these email scams. I personally find it funny that these so called scam artist would think these email scams would actually work...or do they????

URGENT REPLY/CONFIDENTIAL.‏

From:

Mr Joseph Ali (mrjosephali81@msn.com)

Sent:

May 22, 2009 4:51:45 AM

To:

Dear friend,

I know that this letter may come to you as a surprise, I got your contact address from the computerized search. My name is Mr Joseph Ali. I am the Bill and Exchange (assistant) Manager of Bank of Africa Ouagadougou, Burkina Faso. In my department I discovered an abandoned sum of nine million three hundred thousand United State of American dollars ( 9.3MILLION USA DOLLARS) in an account that belongs to one of our foreign customer Mr Kurt Kuhle from Alexandra Egypt who died along with his family in Siber airline that crashed into sea at Isreal

on 4th October 2001.

Since I got information about his death I have been expecting his next of kin to come over and claim his money because we can not release it unless somebody applies for it as the next of kin or relation to the deceased as indicated in our banking guidelines, but unfortunately we learnt that all his supposed nextof kin or relation died alongside with him in the plane crash leaving nobody behind for the claim.

It is therefore upon this discovery that I decided to make this business proposal to you and release the money to you as next of kin or relation to the deceased for safety and subsequent disbursement since nobody iscoming for it and I don't want the money to go into the bank treasury asunclaimed bill.

Am contacting you because our deceased customer is a foreigner and a Burkinabecan not stand as a next of kin to a foreign customer.

The banking guidelines stipulate that the fund should be transferred into the bank treasury after 8 years if nobody is coming for the claim.

I have agreed that 33% of this money will be for you as foreign partner in respect to the provision of your account for the transfer, 2% will be set aside for expenses that might occurred during the business and 65% would be for me, after which I shall visit your country for disbursement according to the percentages indicated. Please I would like you to keep this transaction confidential and as a top secret as you may wish to know that I am a bank official.

Yours sincerely,

Mr Joseph Ali

BUSINESS PROPOSAL‏

From:

Mr Atiko Kaburi (mratikokaburi9@msn.com)

Sent:

May 22, 2009 11:19:53 AM

To:

Dear Friend,

I have been searching for your contact since you left our country some years ago .I do not know whether this is your correct email address or not because I only used your name initials to search for your contact in the internet .In case you are not the person I am supposed to contact , please see this as a confidential message and do not reveal it to another person but if you are not the intended receiver, do let me know whether you can be of assistance regarding my proposal below because it is top secret.

I am still working with the Royal Bank of Africa where we met during your official visit to my country. I  am about to retire from active Bank service to start a new life but I am sceptical to reveal this particular secret to a stranger . You must assure me that everything will be handle confidentially because we are not going to suffer again in life.

It has been 10 years now that most of the greedy African Politicians used our bank to Launder money overseas through the help of their Political advisers. Most of the funds which they transferred out of the shores of Africa was gold and oil money that was supposed to have been used to develop the continent. Their Political advisers always inflated the amounts before transfer to foreign accounts so I also used the opportunity to divert part of the funds hence I am aware that  there is no official trace of how much was transferred as all the accounts used for such transfers were being closed after transfer.

I acted as the Bank Officer to most of the politicians and when I discovered that they were using me to succeed in their greedy act, I also cleaned some of their banking records from the Bank files and no one cared to ask me because the money was too much for them to control. They laundered over $2bn during the process .

As I am sending this message to you, I was able to divert more than One Hundred and Fifty Million Dollars ($150m)  to an escrow account belonging to no one in the bank. The bank is anxious now to know who is the beneficiary to the funds because they have made a lot of profits with the funds.

It is more than  Eight years now and most of the politicians are no longer using our bank to transfer funds overseas. The $150M has been lying waste but I don't want to retire from the bank without transferring the funds to a foreign account to enable me share the proceeds with the receiver. The money will be shared 60% for me and 40% for you .

There is no one coming to ask you about the funds because I secured everything.

I only want you to assist me by providing a bank account where the funds can be transferred. You are not to face any difficulties or legal implications as I am going to handle the transfer personally. If you are capable of receiving the funds, do let me know immediately to enable me give you a detailed information on what to do.

For me, I have not stolen the money from anyone because the other people that took the whole money did not face any problems. This is my chance also to grab my own but you must keep the details of the funds secret to avoid leakages as no one in the bank knows about the funds.

Please supply me the following:

Your current contact address and Telephone Numbers.

Whether you will be able to come down again to my country to meet me before the commencement of the transfer.

I shall intimate you on what to do when I get your confirmation and acceptance. If you are capable of being my trusted associate, do declare your consent to me.

Waiting for your urgent response.

Yours Faithfully,

 Mr Atiko Kaburi