Reflections part 1. The Deeper Wound

" Everybody suffers" - such a strong and rooted statement. However, who can or will argue to the truth underlying these 2 words? In death of a loved ones, some suffer alone or in a group. In recessive economy like the one Hong Kong is facing now, society suffer together. Yet, no matter how empathy anyone feel for each other, suffering is always individual. We feel it as something personal to ourselves. It is invincible to the eye and thus there is no way to show it to others.

"We can only live through the terrible experience of grief and depression, the sense of loss that overwhelms us so much that nothing else matters ".It makes life meaningless. Have you ever felt beaten, tired and sad, so much in pain that nothing in your surrounding, no body, no activities could seem to catch your interests anymore? Have you ever felt that you are helpless or useless that you don't want to do anything when really... there are so much you want to do only to know maybe you have to admit that you might never be able to? When sitting down feels wrong but standing up and walking is not really an option either?

Well... let's walk this journey with me and we'll find out together.

to be continued....

Iam not sure how honest and open one can (OR SHOULD) be when writing almost like a diary like entry on the net especially when it's open to public and in working in an industry when supposedly things are to be kept magical and mysterious. Of course like everyone else, I do have things that I would rather keep to myself, things embarassing or hurting to my memory. Yet, on the other hand, there is something yielding in me to voice out and share my thoughts, life, experiences and feelings openly. Sometimes it becomes such a chocking dilemma that I, myself get entangled in.

Too many things happening at the same time could be ovelwhelming. Could nothing progressing be just equally overwhelming as it dries a soul's spring-well? Imagine both infused? What could we then do? How?

The whelling up emotion that I feel this moment is like the bubbling energy that originates from my core center of life rising through my diagphram up my chest passes my throat yet stops just before entering my nostrils. It's not an explosive flow but irritating. It tickles my tear reservoirs without driving them to secrete but just enough to announce its presence.

The reasons I decided to write these notes that I would be writing are the recessing global economy (to be more exact, Hong Kong's economy), the frustration that seem and might be spreading over the society and my own struggle in my acting career which includes my life in Hong Kong.  I hope this would be enjoyable to read.