What Could Make a Freight Train Take a Dirt Road?

This:

I have no earthly idea why people think this woman has any talent, much less musical merit. And why on earth anyone would think she is pretty is beyond me.

 The Janis Joplin of her generation; another poor copyist whose only redeeming value is her willingness to air her literal and figurative dirty laundry all over the tabloids.

This face could scare a starving cat off a garbage truck:

        I'm going to have nightmares.

Ian Dury is a better looking woman than Amy Winehouse.

And he's a man.

Coyote uglyis a term that describes a person so visually repugnant that if you woke up next to them (hopefully with a brutal whiskey hangover) with your arm under them that you would chew your own arm off like a coyote caught in a leg trap rather than wake the person up by pulling it out from beneath them.

Thank God I stopped drinking when I did.