Movie Review: The Cases/魕

This movie gave me a case.

I know what you’re thinking: “He said he wasn’t gonna review bad movies any more.”

True enough.

But I never said I was going to stop seeing them.

I was just going to see a lot fewer of them.

And let’s face it, it’s not the obviously bad movies that annoy me. It’s the ones that I’m expected to think are good, yet they end up giving me a case of celluloid pinkeye.

I’ll still watch every Wong Jing movie that comes down the (sewer) pipe, unless it’s another one of those made-for-China abortions.

I will still see garbage that I know is garbage.

Especially if it’s Category III garbage. 

I went to see The Unbelievable back in 2009 simply because I wanted to see how bad it could be. And it impressed me with its crass exploitation.

I don’t mean I liked it, I just mean I was impressed by how shameless and prurient it was. It really did make me feel guilty for watching it. And I’mme . 

These ‘true paranormal’ films are nothing but the most threadbare excuse to trot out footage of people killing animals, women’s breasts, and everything else you know you shouldn’t be watching.

That’s why we only watch them at the Dynasty.

Because a dusty old theatre where people still smoke during the movie is the only possible setting where you won’t feel so ashamed of yourself that you openly weep tears of embarrassment.

Even at the Die Nasty, these films make me feel like I should be on some kind of Neighborhood Watch list with all the other perverts.

Cases (!) in point:  The Cases/魕 earns its Cat III rating within the first five minutes.  

And I can’t even tell you how. 

Then it gets more exploitative, shameless, and disgusting.

All while being one of the worst, most unfrightening and intellectually laughable films I’ve seen since, well, The Unbelievable.

There is no good reason for watching this film, and even the bad reasons aren’t very good.

It’s so badly made that it’s funny in places, but the nastiness sort of puts a lid on it.

And the poor execution of the film totally invalidates any potential for learning about some of the things in the film.

It’s just a sh*tty mess, and there’s no other (or better) way to say it. 

But you know what? It’s Cat III, in Cantonese, and doesn’t gobble the China Market C*ck. 

These days, that’s more than enough for me.