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Good intentions. Disastrous results.
Wednesday, Mar 11, 2009 12:00PM / Standard Entry / Members only
7 comments

Back in 2007, I was helping a friend with their computer in their home, which I had done on multiple occasions in return for their friendship and the occasional bowl of noodles. They trusted me and I valued that trust, so much so that I made an effort to not see anything on the computer that was private including messages, photos and passwords.

At the time while testing their printer, I came across a great sporting photo of their spouse. We have a semi-professional printer at home and I thought I'd surprise them by adjusting and printing the photo, so I emailed the photo to myself and deleted the email from the computer to keep it a surprise. Unfortunately, the photo completely slipped my mind and I never got around to printing it out for them.

Today, almost 18 months later having had practically no contact with this friend, I learn that they've been upset with me since that day on the computer. They had heard the 'whoosh' sound of the email going out and questioned me about it immediately. Apparently, I balked for 2 minutes before telling them about the photo and that made them suspect that I had stolen it from the computer ('stolen' would be technically true although in my mind, I was 'borrowing' the photo, to be deleted once it had been printed). When they couldn't find the email, it only confirmed their suspicions. That I never got around to actually printing the photo, well…

On occasion, good intentions can have disastrous consequences. My friend and their spouse believe I stole the photo for personal use, no longer trust me, and are no longer my friends. Ouch! My apologies have been heard but not believed.

Trust is a delicate thing. It takes a long time to build but can be lost in the blink of an eye, or in this case the time it takes to email a photo.

Entry comments (7)

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tien317
posted on Wednesday, Mar 18, 2009 5:46PM [Report]

Well...friendship is something so hard to control nor explain. I guess it takes two to make it work again. So all the best Greg. Anywya, what are u busy with now?
estherteo83
posted on Monday, Mar 16, 2009 1:00PM [Report]

I am sorry to hear abt this. Friendship is fragile. Perhaps the only thing you could do for them is to bless them with warm wishes once in a while to show that you care. whether or not they respond, as long as you have done your part, that is good enough. Try your best, God will do the rest. Cheers
peachey
posted on Wednesday, Mar 11, 2009 10:19PM [Report]

That's unfortunate. Sometimes good intentions go wayward.
Marie Jost
posted on Wednesday, Mar 11, 2009 6:33PM [Report]

This was your friend's wife. Some things couples really do want to keep private. I guess you learned where your friend draws the line. About all you can do is chalk this one up to a "learning experience".
rottendoubt
posted on Wednesday, Mar 11, 2009 3:51PM [Report]

hmm, ya, it was probably not a good idea to take the photo regardless of intentions....
maybe it would have been better to ask ... like "hey this is a nice photo, could i have a copy of it?"
janechu
posted on Wednesday, Mar 11, 2009 2:12PM [Report]

ouch... trust is a delicate thing... once it has been broken, it takes "forever" to build it up again... but hopefully your friend will forget about this someday and hope the friendship can start again... =)
ngakai
posted on Wednesday, Mar 11, 2009 12:25PM [Report]

That's too bad. Although what you did technically is wrong, but I must say a true friend will also give you the benefit of a doubt and forgive & forget. True friends are hard to come by so i guess we'll have to leave it to faith to match us with the one that we care about.

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Gregory Rivers

Stats

Very simply…...
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Very simply…

1965. Born in Gympie, a small gold-mining town in Queensland, Australia.

1987. Arrived in Hong Kong. A month later, I was a guest singer at Alan Tam’s concert (one of Hong Kong’s superstars). I then taught English to make ends meet until the end of the year.

1988. Serendipitously began acting at TVB (Hong Kong’s premier TV station). I have been acting on a full-time contract basis with TVB ever since. Filming in Cantonese, I was involved in more than 200 different television series, some of them quite memorable.

1997. “Magic is the Moonlight”: My ﬁrst stage production; a supporting role. We performed 31 shows at the Hong Kong Academy for Performing Arts.

2002. “Teresa Teng Forever”: My second stage production; a supporting role, this time involving singing. Again, we performed 24 shows at the Hong Kong Academy for Performing Arts.

2004. Having hit a brick wall in my attempts to improve my acting abilities, I attended the Lee Strasberg Institute in L.A. for 3 months. The study helped me immensely.

2005. “Perfume”; My third stage production. My ﬁrst role as a co-lead. We performed 8 shows at the Hong Kong Cultural Centre.

2006. Wanting to improve my singing and also in preparation for “They’re Playing Our Song”, I studied daily with Peisha McPhee in L.A. for four weeks. The improvement was incredible.

2007. “They’re Playing Our Song”; My fourth stage production. My ﬁrst lead. Just one actor and one actress, we performed the 2-hour musical play 10 times at the Hong Kong Arts Centre.

2008. I declined to renew my contract with TVB. After 20 years of serving them faithfully, it was time for me to move on and look for new adventures, and new avenues of continued improvement in my vocation.

Music and acting are my future.
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Occupation: Actor , Singer
Gender: Male
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