Tuesday, Jul 1, 2008 10:52PM / Members only
(Act 1)
Ah Beng calls the telephone operator:
Ah Beng: 'Could you please tell me the time difference between
Singapore and New York?'
Operator: 'Just a minute...'
Ah Beng: 'Thank you.'
Ah Beng got his answer and cut off the line.
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(Act 2)
At a bar in New York, the man sat next to Ah Beng told the bartender, 'JOHNNIE WALKER, SINGLE.'
and his companion said, 'JACK DANIELS,SINGLE.'
The bartender turned to Ah Beng and asked, 'AND YOU, SIR?'
Ah Beng replied: 'Tan Ah Beng, MARRIED.'
(Act 3)
After completing a jigsaw puzzle he'd been working on for quite sometime, Ah Beng proudly shows off the finished puzzle to a friend.
'It took me only 5 MONTHS to do it,' Ah Beng said.
'FIVE MONTHS? Why did you take so long.' the friend asked.
Ah Beng replied, 'No, it is not long at all, look at the box, it says it is for 4 to 7 years'.
(Act 4)
Ah Beng took part in the Singapore Manhunt Competition. During the Q&A segment, the host asks, 'Name a drink that begins with the letter 'G'.'
The crowd shouts, 'Gin! Gin!'. Others exclaim, 'No, its Grape Juice!'
Another smart aleck yells, 'Alamak, Gatorade!'
Host : 'Quiet please.'
Ah Beng laughs hysterically like a hyena before replying, 'C'mon man, I don't need their help? I got more original answer. My answer is 'Gu ni!' (milk in Hokkien)
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(Act 5)
Ah Beng had just bought a new computer and was using it when he encountered some problems. After a few attempts, he decided to use the 'Help' command. Soon after, he became very irritated and called the computer shop for support.
Ah Beng : 'I pressed the 'F1' key for help... but it's been over half an hour & still nobody has come to help me....'
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(Act 6)
In the class.
Teacher: 'Class, do you know the meaning of parents?'
Ah Beng: 'Yes, teacher, it means father and mother'
Teacher: 'Good. Can you give me an example?'
Ah Beng: 'Sure. Cowboy's parents means cowboy's father and
mother. Also can say Cowboy's father is Cow Pay and
Cowboy's mother is Cow Boo.
So if they walk together, we can say they are 'Cow Pay
Cow Boo''.
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(Act 7)
Ah Beng with two red ears went to his doctor. The doctor asked him what had happened to his ears and he answered,' I was ironing a shirt and the phone ring lor- but instead of picking up the phone, I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear. So Kena lor!'
'Oh Dear!' the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. 'But, what happened to the other ear?'
Ah Beng: 'That stupid fellow called back again loh!'
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(Act 8)
Why did Ah Beng go to a movie with his 18 friends?
Because according to the advertisement, below 18 is not allowed to go in
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Sunday, Jun 8, 2008 12:32PM / Members only
Below are four (4) questions and a bonus question. You have to answer them instantly.
You can't take your time, answer all of them immediately. Let's find out just how clever you really are.
下列有4 個問題及一個加分題，你必須立刻回答，不能花時間慢慢想，讓我們看看你有多聰明。
Ready? GO!!! (scroll down)
準備好，向下捲！
First Question: 第一題 :
You are participating in a race. You overtake the second place person. What position are you in?
你參加賽跑，追過第2 名，你是第幾名？
Second Question第二題 :
If you are in a race, and you overtake the last person, then you are?
你參加賽跑，你追過最後一名，你是第幾名？
Very tricky maths! Note: This must be done in your head only. Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it.
很詭異的算術！這只能在腦中盤算。不要使用紙與筆或計算機，試試看。
Third Question: 第三題
Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000. Now add 30. Add another 1000. Now add 20. Now add another 1000. now add 10.
What is the total?
以1000 加上40，再加 1000 ，再加 30，再加 1000，現在加上20，再加一次 1000，現在加上10，總數是什麼？
Today is definitely not your day. Maybe you will get the last question right?
今天對你鐵定諸事不宜，或許最後一題你會答對？
Fourth Question:第四題
Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono. What is the name of the fifth daughter?
Mary的父親有 5個女兒，第 1個女兒 Nana， 第 2個女兒 Nene， 第3個女兒 Nini， 第 4個女兒 Nono，第 5個女兒的名字是什麼？
Okay, now the bonus round. You can partially redeem yourself with this one!!!!!
好，現在是加分題。這題可稍稍解救（彌補）你！
Bonus Question加分題 :
There is a mute person who wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing one's teeth he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done. Now if there is a blind man who wishes to buy a pair of sunglasses, how should he express himself?
一個啞巴想買牙刷，他模仿刷牙的動作，成功的向店主表達，也完成了購買。現在如果一個瞎子想買一副太陽眼鏡，他要如何表達？
*** i will send u the correct answer when u try it :) !!
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