Because this month is the Breast Cancer Awareness Month I put the ribbon on my mom's picture and me who I took couple of weeks ago. Believe it or not its the first time since my past 25 years living in this World that I have my mom's picture taken with me.

Silly of Me aswell who never know my mom's birthday until this very moment (I just called her ...duh!!!) ... she is 47 years old now. Had live trough many things, this include her breast cancer couple of years ago.

My mom and dad got devorce quite so long ago as I posted on my earlier blog. A tragic things that happen to every couple left their child (if they had one) in a very unstable emotion (so far many had the same feelings). Since then my mom live by her own.

Live by her own as in only doing things alone, namely changing the roof when the rains invade our house, climb the rambutan tree and throw down at me down below because she wont let me climb the tree and let her alone get up there (do your mom ever do that .. not all I believe). She manage almost everything on her own including only relying on her beauty saloon as her occupation and pay all my school tuition ... was really amazing how she did it if I think about it now.

Years gone by (around 10 years) finally she had a crush on a Guy. A guy who I thought could replaced my Fatherly figure who was gone. I was wrong! Was constantly arguing in the house for every simple matters that occur in the house until one day decided not too much communicating between the two of us...until today. Less argue had happen since then... we all good now ... we have nothing to argue anyway ...hehehhe.. Life moves on.

Anyway back to my mom who then one day complaint about her having some sort of a bump on her right side breast, a simple bump WHO EVERY BODY SHOULD CARE ABOUT ... its the cancer who keep growing and spreading through the back at that moment. We were so having zero knowledge to what it is until its late and grown so fast spread all the way to the back.

As a villagers in Indonesia who also believe in some superstitions ... My mom was seeking to the one "who know many things". It worked a bit ... some of the tumor cause by the cancer was taken away from the back thus leaving only in the front whom was mistakenly understand as healed.

A few years afterwards the pain was again step by. This time it was spreading throughout the front right breast. My mom was constantly drinking this herb which I dont know what the name was... The herb was good as it can clear her lung and diagnose as non smoker by the doctor while she is a smoker. I believe was the herb was the one who also keep the cancer not to spread out more to her body.

The herb was not helping trough the pain though. She often cries every night trying very hard to hold the pain that grow, which by then the side of the breast was already open up making a hole of stink flesh (until now I never seen it since I cant stand seeing such wound). The herb was killing the cancer but also eating up the flesh along with it. The pain was seen so awful as in you cant go to sleep and scream every night just to hold up all the pain even if you have a pain killer.

At last we have opening and finally getting some aid to go to hospital (yes we dont have money just to go to hospital). The doctor was shock to see the wound cause by the cancer, he never seen such case of cancer. He decided to have my mom to have a chemotherapy around 7 dose of chemotherapy. My mom was anxious about it (while other was worried getting one . . my mom is anxious ... :P). There she goes and happily getting chemotherapy as nothing was in her way. I remember just once taking her to the hospital because she was nervous of never ever been in hospital for herself. The next day and afterward she just went alone (she is a warrior after all). The effect of the chemotherapy was nothing to her ... she even went bold because of it, was throwing up a lot after taking the pills gave by the doctor but then she ate more afterward saying what goes out will be replaced. While other was getting help just to walk out the chemotherapy room, she was walking happily out just like nothing had happened. This made me realize how before was so painful taking that the chemotherapy was nothing compare to it.

The chemotherapy went a success and the doctor said that she just needed to go through radiation therapy afterward. She went on it about 40-50 times if I'm not wrong and later the doctor decided that the wound and the cancer was healed.

She went back home and life moves on. I remember how she love plants afterward, plants many things, she could even sweep the floor, get back up opening her saloon again. Was so relieving back then to see her getting up as a champion.

What I learn about her winning was not only because of her medication, but the biggest part was her determination, her willing to get health, and part of it was the spirit given by the sorrounding. Not much who were out winning as this disease might come back again in the future but I hope they will never return.

Its enough to see her scream in pain. Its time to see her in smile :)