I realise that i should update what i post here on my first blog which is on friendster, which i will do after this entry.

Spent most of Sunday with 2 mothers - my mom and my grandmother, eating and shopping and walking. Nice and cosy. One of the places we went was Giant at Tampines and they were sweetly giving out carnations to mothers. So of course, the 2 mothers i am with received. Me too. (which part of me looked like a mother?) But i felt touched, in a way, that i must be blessed. I could not explain why i feel this way. I accept it as it is :)

Am watching the telecast of Michelle Chia's wedding reception.... Lots of effort to make it a beautifully memorable day, lots of committed involvement from family and friends, lots of sweat.. Hope it would be truly touching for the 2 of them and all my best wishes.

Why do i write here? Hmm... I have no idea... might pause writing here for a while... just let things be...

Saw my specialist today, whom i need to see about twice a year.. always feel good to see him, because he is nice and gentle and tries to be understanding and does not impose things on me. I try to do that for my own patients too. Everyone has to walk their own path, no one can walk it for them, so the same goes for choices and decisions. Believe that everyone will try their damnest to make their best choices at any point in time. Just need to remember that change is constant. Oh yes, my initial topic about talking about my specialist is that, there are many people in my life that i always i want to hug and say thank you many times over. However, certain behaviour and manners are considered inappropriate. I have to respect what society is while being grateful. I hope to get to say my thanks in time, in the most appropriate way (in person or not).

Thank you :) This is me, signing in and now signing out. Till the next time, i bequeath my thoughts, take care. A bientot.

Hmm... i have a blog on Friendster which I had not updated for a long while. Due to being tired of thinking and writing after a day's work. I enjoy writing my thoughts and feelings freely... hate it when i realise they are being read by some people. I mean, i do realise my blogs will be read, but when certain people read it, i find i could not write freely... anyway, my friendster blog has been linked to my facebook, as i had not been on friendster since a long time back, only go on it to blog.

Anyway, i am new to this website, just started yesterday. Am pleasantly surprised to find this website. I was online looking for something on Sammy Hung and ah-ha, here i am. I wonder what i would find here or learn here.

Today is Vesak Day. I had met up with a college mate whom i had not seen since beginning of this year. He revealed that he learnt last month that his kidneys have failed and is waiting for a transplant. He has been undergoing dialysis since last year and I felt sad to hear his condition had worsen. This friend of mine could confide some of his feelings and thoughts to me. He rationalises it as the fact that i studied psychology and i could listen and offer some advice (which he might not take, hahah). I can feel his depressed feelings but, as I know, as you know, the only way a person can get help is when he is ready to get help and when he himself wants to. I could only listen, empathise and bring to his attention what options he has and decide himself. I wish him all the best.

I accompanied my mom to the temple after that. I usually only go with my mom. I am not sure why. Maybe the crowd, maybe an uncertainty. I only prayed for my health as I have been falling ill quite often these 2 months and for my family and good friends to be well. A thought came to me, something that someone important kept saying to me but i could not understand. Something about "not to be too attached to him". I was not sure who was him. But today, i had a vague inkling - someone whom i like and who likes me too but we live and work in 2 different countries, different timezones. We cant be said to be in a relationship.  Is he whom 'gugu' is talking about?

Then when this idea came into my mind, i had another thought. If i have to be alone for the rest of my life, the rest of my life would be about accepting, having peace in my heart and mind, doing i can for the people that matter to me and being responsible to whom i am helping now and in fact, it is about having courage, finding my own happiness and that would be my daily challenge. To be the best that i can be, with dignity and integrity, and sincerity. Now, that is one very hugh task i have to take on to the very last day, as I accept the outcome of 'gugu's' advice - detachment.

Well, that is a lot for my first blog. I am not sure who would read it. I hope i could write freely here. And I wil try to maintain this blog if i get some motivation. Haaha, ya, i do realise that sounds like a contradiction. Well, this is me. And I am signing off here, for now. Till the next time, "be well, do good and keep in touch".

P/S: I like quotes, so i would use them at times and i will use quotation marks to indicate that I might not have came up with them first  ;)