sitting on a hard single mattress, white sheet, white walls, old blue blanketbooks and patients regular checks, sleepless evenings and earlier morningbeg for the healing to beginin a moment's noticein space defined by pulsemetresand rhythms.this morning i watched the sunrisereflected off the harbour shipsfar off, little frozen mirrors floatingwaiting, welcoming:no nerves calmed in ward bed - the congee man comes soon after.sevenhundredfortyfive pagesinto an 1100 pager, words tangle with thoughts ofwalking, with what ifs, with blood clotsand amputation,then back to the words once again.what makes me so lucky?what if i am not?genteel doctors make the roundsseniors get the ten cent showsubjects means to ends, and so on:some lots better than others, some dependent on degree of ruptureand thus on success of surgery:"here we have a 35 year old basketball player"'he said congenially to his seniors,nodding and wondering and ready to continuetheir rounds at all costs. on to the next bed.bring me home. little daughters.bring me home to my queen.
A comeback cut short. After an attempt at a career extension.Was it really cut short?Or have I already outlasted my stay?Was last year's farewell the true exclamation?Is there ever?
I have never believed in fate. Only coincidence.But now, it seems that I have tempted both.No melodrama. I won't ever play this game again.I will never dunk again.Only remember. Cherish:A career beloved.Om.
Had the priv to host Race, Van Ness, Phil and Co. last week at the Dub. Coincided with the onset of the Film Festival and a slew of stars coming in.The above served as a first class warm up. It felt like family immediately, from the first site visits to the last stage of shooting at the Living Room bar, where I had to ask Phil to use hand signals so he wouldn't disturb the packed house of actual guests! Turned out, actually, our guests - who have come to understand that at W Hotels, this sort of thing can happen anytime - didn't really care that there were DV cams surveying the room. Thanks Race and Van for the nice greeting to my daughter. Despite her bad mood, she was referring to you both as "jie jie" and "ge ge" later when i showed her your web pages. All good things from the W.
Check out the vid....
What a memorable night.
farewell game: next thursday. 8:30pm. mongkok macpherson stadium. end of an era. what do you do when all you have ever known seems to have come to an end? rosanne, would you stop singing? jo, would you stop creating? pat, would you cease sketching? when these daze come, let me tell you it means everything.
tryin to retire from this game, but still it gots me on the wraps. need to wake up this morning at 6:15am for all-day executive training. somehow micro-manage our music matters event preparations for wednesday during meeting breaks. squeeze in some nutrients and water. have a 5:30p meeting. get to macpherson stadium at 7:15p. stretch and prepare so i can play 35 minutes of kick-ass defense and potent offense vs fukien so i can silence all the doubters on my coaching staff who have lost faith in me.
he's too slow. he's too old. he can't close out on shooters. he's reckless and shoots too fast. he doesn't have the gas.
7 years, no trust, no respect for me.
i am all alone on this court. me and my pride. waiting for some faith that, for some reason, after all this time, i have still not earned.
I'M BACK. ...Read more
|Favorite Faves||Basketball, Resorts, Chanting to the Indian Ocean, Writing stuff, Cormac McCarthy, Guitar, Erotica, the poetry of Pablo Naruda, the lyrics of Mark Lanegan, the song "Typhoon Child", the passion of Qiu Hong, the insights of my father, afternoons|
NOTE: Users of the original website please Click here to reactivate your account.
New users - Join the alivenotdead.comcommunity instantly by confirming your identity with a trusted authentication service.
Returning users - Please use with the same authentication service to login to your alivenotdead.com account.
First time users can create a new account from scratch by authenticate using any of the following trusted services:
WARNING: If you disconnect all your social media accounts your profile will be locked and you will not be able to access it again. If you want to keep your page, please add another social media account and then remove this one.
If you understand the risks, click this box to deauthorize your account.