I put Mariah Carey through a weight loss program, in this case paint.net, and here's the result. Not bad for free, lightweight photoshop alternative.


Before:




After:

Disclaimer: Paint.net won't photoshop for those who need its more advanced features.

A little girl asked her father, "How did the human race appear?" The father answered, "God made Adam and Eve and they had children, and so was all mankind made..."

Two days later the girl asked her mother the same question.. The mother answered, "Many years ago, there were monkeys from which the human race evolved."

The confused girl returned to her father and said, "Dad, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Mom said they developed from monkeys?"

The father answered, "Well, dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family
and your mother told you about hers."


Joke stolen from here.

Press release below,

KELLY HU TO STAR IN “ALMOST PERFECT”
FOR SLEW PICTURES

NEW YORK, NY, October 1, 2009 – Slew Pictures announced today that Kelly Hu (“The Scorpion King,” “X-Men 2”) will star in writer/director Bertha Bay-Sa Pan’s romantic comedy “Almost Perfect.”  Pan will produce with Derrick Tseng (“Life During Wartime,” “Choke,” “The Ten,” “Snow Angels”) and Riva Marker (“The Winning Season,” “Grace is Gone,” “Trucker”).  Production is set for October 2009 in New York City.

 
“Almost Perfect” is the story of Vanessa, a 30-something New York career woman.  After too many years of being everybody's go-to girl, she finally gets a chance at love when she meets a man who's almost perfect for her.  But, just as she starts to consider the possibility of romance, her family suddenly comes undone.  As she juggles a high-maintenance “fashionista” sister on the brink, a surf-bum brother hiding out, an overly-intellectual mother who knows it all, a retired father on a quest for meaning -- and the nearly perfect boyfriend who gets fed up with it all -- Vanessa discovers that the person she really needs to save is herself.
Pan said, “I am so excited to work with Kelly, who not only kicks butt as an action hero, but is also an incredibly thoughtful and nuanced actor, with a killer sense of humor. I can't wait to watch her experience this emotional journey on screen. It's going to be a lot of fun.”


Other featured cast members include Ivan Shaw, Roger Rees, Tina Chen, Edison Chen, and Christina Chang.
 
Founded by award-winning filmmaker Bertha Bay-Sa Pan, Slew Pictures is a New York based production company that develops and produces universal stories that entertain and inspire.  Current projects include Annette Apitz’s “Fighting Fish,” starring Val Emmich and Halley Feiffer.

When the coach told Cleveland Cavaliers guard Delonte West to work on his shot, I don't think this was what he had in mind...

Cavs guard arrested with shotgun, two handguns

Man says he robbed bank to get away from wife


Now we all know why there are bank robberies.