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HI GUYS~
以真诚之心，借网络之力，传播善良……阿弥陀佛……

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雨季

2009-04-10 7:45PM / 會員可以看



最近的几天，总是梦到诸如同学自杀、整晚奔跑或者坐在考场解不出数学题……这样沉重的戏码屡屡在梦中上演，把人折腾的常常一身汗的醒来，头昏脑胀，眼睛红肿。

人一旦休息不好，精神就不会好，而且往往连带着心情也低落，昨天给老妈打完电话，我就想，我终究还是进入了自己世界的雨季了。

孩子，尤其是女孩子，总是会在内心藏匿一些童稚、单纯、可笑但是温暖的小梦想。这种梦想最初是尖锐而且明晰的，仿佛只要长大了就可以伸手够到；小时候期待长大，也曾经不屑和幼于自己的孩子玩耍，一心想着做大人，穿父母的衣服和鞋子，学大人的口气一本正经的教训别人，在小孩子的眼里，当大人是幸福的，所以我们迫不及待的想长大。当年龄年复一年的增长，等到自己也要进入二字头的时候，却发现成长未必像想象中的来的美丽。神经大条了近二十年之后，我终于第一次因为自己的未来，彷徨、矛盾、不安和焦躁。

       首先，并不能说自己是个本本分分安于现状的人，像大多数人一样，我也渴望壮怀激烈，希望出人头地。我寄予自己希望，刺激自己超越别人，要面子，不服输。但也是由此，我更加讨厌拿掉我们希望的蛾子老师，连同她百教不厌的语法。她很明白的告诉我们，如果在大城市的学校没有人际，干脆想也别想，别以为你在你们院能排前多少名，都是没用的。她告诉我们，你们别逞强，乖乖的考河大吧。连带一副得意嘴脸的提及她在学校中的地位，暗示着她能给我们提供的实惠。我用了两周的时间承认了她所叙述的现实，又用了一周时间确定了我对数学的厌恶。

清明节的那天，老爸兴奋的喝多了，因为淼淼姐考上了北京大学的硕博连读。这个欢天喜地的消息一下子让我泣不成声，很惭愧的不是因为喜悦，而是因为，它天杀的让我回想起了某些曾经根深蒂固的梦想。如果妈妈没有擅自卖我的书的话，那本载有我文章的盗版书应该还扔在家里北屋的小床头柜里。书中开篇，就是名为《红门情节》的一篇作文，作者是我。其实并不想要矫情的说起以前的我是什么什么样，也不想因为自己有着什么不切实际的梦想去抒发感情。只是，这种早已尘封的梦想猛地一下被拂去灰尘，心里不管如何强大还是会感到很酸楚。

         我更加不想考研。因为不想学数学，因为考上好学校的梦想不切实际。清明节放假的那几天，我觉得我要开始接受自己成为一个实际的人了。我想要工作了。

         但是与此同时我却没有办法下定决心放弃考研。虽然说人生除去考研也还是有n种选择，虽然说研究生的扩招和国家线的降低一定会让研究生的身价和整体素质一泻千里，我还是小小的期盼自己能够闯荡到大城市去看看外面的世界。总而言之，我还没有想这么快的败在自己的梦想前面。

我來說兩句
22:22

2008-05-06 10:33PM / 會員可以看

Recently, I became a little bit afraid to check out the time. U know why? because almost every time i look at my watch, the time is 11:11><

I dont know why, but i suppose the time is a suggestion about my life or future, will i be single forever? ...that is not good.

I start watching <Friends> since last month, i found that it is really a terrific TV series!!! I really enjoy the little funny things shared between those people and sometimes i might think: life couldnt be better. actually, i did a questionaire yesterday, i remember there was a question: choose one thing that you cannt live with: there were three choices: money, love and ficial looking. I wrote an answer which is really the real answer for me: friends.

A-ah, it is 22:33now, always the double number! when i check out the time !!!!

it's weird! yet funny~~

我來說兩句
Lovely winter holiday

2008-01-30 8:46AM / 會員可以看

It has been a long time since last time I refreshed my blog. I'm really sorry about that but there are too many examinations i had to prepare for

Whatsoever, i finally come back!(sometimes i felt i just like the dark lord-voldemort) The first thing i do is reading the 7th harry potter book. i am really crazy about the little wizard who is full of courage, love and always a clear mind. I am now expecting for the next harry potter movie!! HAHAHA~

Yesterday, i went shopping with my best friend XU.(I wonder if "iron mate" is understood but our relationship is just as hard as iron~) But something unhappy happened when we came into a boutique: i carelessly broke a little glass bottle in the boutique and a small piece of glass priked my finger. my finger keep bleeding though it was just a small wound, finally a piece of woundplast stopped the bleeding. i felt bad because i must pay for the broke of this small bottle which made me bleeding for a long time!(even though i know that it was my mistake.)

as a whole, it is still quite a wonderful experience going out with a best friend. The spring festival is coming

today is called the "small new year day" in the mainland which means the start of the new year. HA!

happy new year everyone! i'll try to refresh my blog more in the coming days~

我來說兩句
ielts result is not everything

2007-11-04 10:59PM / 會員可以看

The result of my ilets test on 20nd Oct. coms out, my final score is : overall: 6.5, speaking 5.5 listening 7 reading 6.5 and writing 6. isnt bad for a sophomore , ah?

However, i confronted with a problem: life seems become not as interesting as before. i began to sleep all day and tired to go for class. everything seems boring to me, and the worst thing is that i do not know the reason.

i thought it was perhaps because the ielts test. Before the test, my life was always on the go, i has a clearly destination and i was energetic. now, the situation is totally different: i 've no idea what i am doing, i thought all the lectures are boring.i loss the motivation and desire to study.

i feel sick, i know i must try to change the situation. today i went to shopping with my friend bobo, who is preparing for the ielts test coming in 17th Nov. she told me a lot of things happened on her and her situation is just like me in last month. devoted, energetic and full of passion. i was totally touched.

i must change the situation i am in, and i believe i can.

我來說兩句
My seven-day holiday

2007-10-03 8:11PM / 會員可以看

I am not sure from which year on, Natinal Day became a symble of a seven-day holiday, just as our labour day. I came back home this holiday together with my younger brother and one of my my roomates.

I spent the first day of the holiday on buying computer with my sister. After a careful comparation and bargain, we finally chose a computer in " Aoc" brand of 4000RMB, with a gorgerous 20# screen. It has been several years since my sister bought her first computer, which is slow and old-fashioned, sometimes it could not even connect well to the network. On the afternoon of that day, the new computer have setted in my sister's room. it is in a good quality and performs well. HA, the first thing we searched for since the new computer connected to the network is super junior's MV<Don't don>(it's really cool!)

well, the second day of my holiday, is my 18th Bthday. it is rather natural actually, no birthday cake, no eggs, no noodels, even no short messages! ! I even felt that i was forgotten by my friends, i felt so sad~ however, things not happen as i first thought, messages flocked my cellphone at the night, i felt happy and warm~ thx all, my friends!

today, i came to my grands' with my parents. i met my brothers, sisters there. they are kind and enthusiatic to me even though i occasionally met them. we played badminton happily. my little brother has a really good appitite: he almost ate a whole chicken at lunch! i was shocked~ enjoy the time we spent together!

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