Last month..helped a colleague with her project............80 percent was done by me......and yet..she got increment of 700 in her salary due to the success of that project...and I got NOTHING.............no one ever knows that I was the one who did all the research and write up...she was the one that submitted it to the boss....and ..........

How do i felt? dumb................definitely so dumb. She felt bad about it and told me she wanted to explained to the boss..but I think....no need lah (double dumb)...as I don wan the boss to misinterpret the whole issue again.....

Frustrated...........dumb................and sad....................................

Aiii..thats life...God bless..................................

A girl-friend dropped by at my place..and wow...she was amazed with all the cassettes and the CDs..videos and etc of Beyond's collection that I have..hehehehe =p.  Been their ardent fan for a verrrrrry looooooong time lah. Well..maybe not that long comparatively to some of those fans out there but...can be considered as long enuf liao leh.  They are my inspiration for picking up my guitar and oso drum lessons from my church member =)

I never stop listening to their songs actually..errr..well..maybe that may not be 100 percent rite lah. Or put in this way lah...listen to their songs .the one..whereby when Ka Kui was still with us=(

Actually, I stopped buying their albums...the "latest" I have is the one they released after Ka Kui went back to the Lord............."2nd Floor Rear Block"

And start packing up everything except their CDs as I guess..it was a painful...painful news and experience. Sound sentimental eh? Well, I spend my whole free time practising guitars just to play their songs....and even practising my voice so that I can sing like them!! (as if lah I am that good!!) The whole school and the neighborhood know that I go nuts over this group. But alas..when they had their concert here...was not able to see them...cant afford the ticket =((

Listening to Beyond's song now..and another Beyond's fan told me....indeed..Ka Kui will always be in everyone...at least for his fans...memory forever...

So..anyone...if interested..do drop by..have jamming!! =) God bless!!

Was so down for the whole morning till.......he suddenly stopped at my place and asked me to go out for a cup of coffee - morning break ..as what he described it.

Huh?  We never go for breakfast together...and he won't even asks me out - i meant just me and him only lah...just a cup of coffee nia leh..y so anxious huh?

Well..went to a nearby kopitiam...order a glass of ice milo............

He suddenly blurted out that he felt sorry for what had happened yesterday.  Seeing that I was bombarded like hell and yet none in the group dare to comment anything.  He hopes that I was ok..dont take it too seriously and think too much about it...

Wow.........suddenly can see the sun shine so brightly and heard a lot birds chirping sound..haha  Well..it does make my day leh..as before that conversation..I was sooo down and dont know how to start my day and dont  feel like talking to anyone.....Wah......

Anyway...it was just for about 15 to 20 minutes talk nia lah..nothing much going on...just a normal colleage to colleague conversation with some words of encouragement from him...

I can see rainbows everywhere now..hahahah...(just over a cup errr...a glass of milo nia leh..please leh...)

Thanks for the encouragement..........................God bless

1) U get shot by ur boss in the board room....

2) The guy that u admires were in the room.............

3) Ur boss think that u are headbone and trying to suck up...

4) When u try to explain - its head bone  when u told him in detail and sent in a report of your activities for all the projects - its suck up . when u dont do it - its call ignorance and disrespect the boss

5) 90% percent of ur colleagues agreed and comment the same

6) The next comment- ur boss think that if u takes lead and try to stand up to ur point - its not team spirit and no cooperatveness..if u just listen and let others do all the time - u are a leader...u don know how to decide meh???? tats wat he will says.

7) When u wanna voice out - u are defensive..when u dont say anything - u as a leader..no idea one ah?? cannot justify thing izit?

8) When u comment right out loud in front of everyone its - u as a leader u just talked like that..never consider how other ppl felt one ah? ...when u just keep quiet and wait til only left u and the boss in the room then u comment - wah..y don u said it just now? u wanna backstab them ah??? tats very bad of u.................

Felt very hurt + frustrated + sad + disappointed

But wat can I do....judgement had been made...decision has been done...and impression has been pint down by them.....

To quit..its impossible - I need the job - to be precise - I need the money to sustain my life...sigh sigh sigh...

Worse - one or two knew the actual situation - but none dare to voice up...which including him........double triple sigh.........I guess i am still expecting too much tho...another sigh....I guess - the reality is...everyone is just trying to take care of their own butts and rice bowl.....the reality of life...............

So anyone hiring??? Can singg, can act....but of cos I aint that beautiful enuf to be the star of the day or wat so ever lah...any extra...I am fine with it oso.......well really need God's wisdom and strenght for this......God bless...