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Jaine *
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respecting women beyond voting for CPAF

Hopefully you have seen the blogs encouraging you to vote for CPAF  (Centre for Pacific Asian Family) and you have voted.  www.voteCPAF.org  I have voted but I was a little dismayed when viewing some of the videos supporting the campgain.  Why?  The particular artists in the video that dismayed me have also made quite sexist and disrespectful music regarding women and the hypocrisy gets up my nose. 

So often with campaigns like this, everyone gets on board but very few people challenge the beliefs they hold which contribute to the problem.  Don't know what I'm talking about?

Do you think it is funny or okay to ply a women with alcohol to get sex from her?  If a woman cannot consent, it's rape.  No means No, Yes means Yes and if there is any doubt - keep it in your pants.  Even if you don't like it do you speak up when a friend talks about getting some with the "drunk" girl or does your uncomfortable silence consent to his behaviour.

Do you "respect" a  woman less if she dresses provocatively or sleeps around?  Are you less sympathetic if she is sexually assaulted or generally treated poorly?   At the end of the day a women's sexuality is nobody's business but hers and those she chooses to share it with.   Cornelia Otis Skinner summed it up best with "Women's virtue is man's best invention".  What better way to control the behaviour of women.

Do you think it is women's role to cook, clean and be the nuturer?  How do you feel about women that are not?  How do you feel about women who leave their children?  That it is unnatural?  There are many ways to be a woman, just as there a many ways to be a man.  Women who do not fit into the traditional role are often disrespected.    The domestic duties, whilst now shared more by men, are still predominately carried out by women.

Do you think porn, strippers etc is all good fun but would be mortified if it was your mother/sister/daughter/girlfriend?  Why - the stripper you are oggling at is someone's daugther (and maybe one or all of the other things too). 

Do you enjoy the objectification of women - and lets face it, sex sells, so it is very widespread everywhere.

My list could go on.  I hope this campaign helps but until some general attitudes towards women change it's pissing in the wind.

almost 11 years ago 0 likes  7 comments  0 shares
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I'm not sure if I'll vote, I'm not familiar with the artists that are endorsing it. And judging by what you said about some of them making sexist and disrespectful remarks towards women in their music, that makes me less inclined to vote. I hate hypocrites.
almost 11 years ago
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Along similar lines I was thinking geez guys how does this fit into the `pimping ain`t easy` campaign? There is something so basically misogynistic about rap and hip/hop that I worry for the young women out there. At least in my day we worked down from a paradigm of virtue not up from the expectation of unimpeded coitus. Even though virtue may have been invented (IMO to control inheritance) it has a protective veneer at least through adolescence and the early teens - now I pity the parent of a 12-year-old girl. It is as if one training bra and they become a target. You and I will have to disagree about the way skimpily-clad stripper-look wannabes should expect to be treated. While logically everyone should be treated with respect no matter how they look IMO appearance and behavior can invite trouble. No is no but I think the burden is on both parties to act responsibly -- it`s like smoking around gas fumes - don`t be surprised if the the situation turns volatile. I mean WTF are parents thinking these days? I see some 13 year olds at the middle school who look legal (18)! uh uh my daughter would not be in that category. As for this campaign I also think it is important to treat the wound but you have to examine the underlying infection. It appears that in the Pacific Asian community there is underreporting. Why? That goes way deeper than the pressures of modern society. I did what I could to help in the voting (although I appear to be incapable of casting my 4 remaining votes for some reason but I am not adept at Facebook stuff -- any help there?). I just think that the testosterone surplus in most young male artists has them pumping out all the standard machismo taking it to the limit. I would guess though that these same guys treat their mothers and sisters and aunties on a different level. Unfortunately the influence of that commercially-viable music and culture will reverberate for years for those listeners who cannot separate fantasy from reality. Bitches and ho`s? Say it in a song and it will make its way into the street and into the home. That is an instructional pie chart. It is all about objectification. Thanks for the blog Jaine. It is worth discussing. You are consistently a watchdog (hahaha) for hypocrisy and women`s causes. Having a daughter makes you even more alert to the issues out there.
almost 11 years ago
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JS
The video was effective in making me feel, it was Karin's part that really got me, her personal experience was worth a thousand others. I can see your point on the particular artists involved in the video but their songs are made for entertainment purpose just like horror films and such. In their life outside I'm sure they feel the same as us about violence toward women, not realising that they could be considered hypocrites, I think they'd be quite shocked to realise it to be honest, but I can definitely see the feeling you have. I'm extremely defensive with women who wear what they want, yes a lot of girls wear stuff they know will attract a guy but that never means an invitation to sexually abuse them, same as I feel that prostitutes don't get the right defense they are entitled too when they are raped. Things need to change, this video is a good thing for people to witness.
almost 11 years ago
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jaine, Its good that you have put this up, I long ago learnt that the "ladies" were human beings first and femme fatales somewhere after that and funny enough I learnt it from old ladies when I was younger. About the only thing that annoys me is reverse attribution from someone who assumes that I behave like someone else they knew that hassled them or worse. My old lady (mother) was as tough as nails, never let anyone ever sh*t on her and did it all her own way and succeeded. The magic rule in our house was "There are no servants around here".
almost 11 years ago
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my answer is NO for all of them
almost 11 years ago
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you make good valid points. And I agree with you that the general attitude towards women needs to change. o.O
almost 11 years ago
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Spot on, Jaine ... too bad that "sex sells" , but ya know, it goes the other way when we women ogle men too ...
almost 11 years ago

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