Hopefully you have seen the blogs encouraging you to vote for CPAF  (Centre for Pacific Asian Family) and you have voted. www.voteCPAF.org  I have voted but I was a little dismayed when viewing some of the videos supporting the campgain.  Why?  The particular artists in the video that dismayed me have also made quite sexist and disrespectful music regarding women and the hypocrisy gets up my nose. 

So often with campaigns like this, everyone gets on board but very few people challenge the beliefs they hold which contribute to the problem.  Don't know what I'm talking about?

Do you think it is funny or okay to ply a women with alcohol to get sex from her?  If a woman cannot consent, it's rape.  No means No, Yes means Yes and if there is any doubt - keep it in your pants.  Even if you don't like it do you speak up when a friend talks about getting some with the "drunk" girl or does your uncomfortable silence consent to his behaviour.

Do you "respect" a  woman less if she dresses provocatively or sleeps around?  Are you less sympathetic if she is sexually assaulted or generally treated poorly?   At the end of the day a women's sexuality is nobody's business but hers and those she chooses to share it with.   Cornelia Otis Skinner summed it up best with "Women's virtue is man's best invention".  What better way to control the behaviour of women.

Do you think it is women's role to cook, clean and be the nuturer?  How do you feel about women that are not?  How do you feel about women who leave their children?  That it is unnatural?  There are many ways to be a woman, just as there a many ways to be a man.  Women who do not fit into the traditional role are often disrespected.    The domestic duties, whilst now shared more by men, are still predominately carried out by women.

Do you think porn, strippers etc is all good fun but would be mortified if it was your mother/sister/daughter/girlfriend?  Why - the stripper you are oggling at is someone's daugther (and maybe one or all of the other things too). 

Do you enjoy the objectification of women - and lets face it, sex sells, so it is very widespread everywhere.

My list could go on.  I hope this campaign helps but until some general attitudes towards women change it's pissing in the wind.

In the UK, Australia and New Zealand, the 'peace' sign as demonstrated below by Rik from the Young Ones, always has the palm face forward.  The 'up yours' sign, as demonstrated by Vyv from the Young Ones, always has the back of the hand facing foward. 

The ' up yours' sign with two fingers is equivalent to the one with one finger.

In some of the photos I see on here people are giving the "up yours" hand sign and I wonder if they are meaning too or if there is not the distinction in other places?

If you are travelling to the UK, Australia or NZ becareful about the kind of peace sign you give, because if you give the 'up yours' signal by accident you might be unintentionally picking a fight.  Of course any decent person will probably recognise it as a mistake but, alas, not everybody is decent unfortunately.

EDIT:  I should add, it is also the case in Ireland and South Africa.  Pretty much English speaking countries outside of North America.

There are some good readers on here, I thought it might be nice to share some of the books we enjoyed most in 2009.

Since I started working at the bookshop my reading has picked up and my tbr (to be read) piles have grown exponentially (3 piles beside the bed and one on the bed)

Anyhu, without further ado here are my favourite reads from 2009 (not all of them are new and they are not in any particular order).

The Millenium Trilology by Stieg Larsson.   - The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, The Girl who played with Fire and The Girl who kicked the Hornet's Nest.  Great reading, the second two are the best two, some quite nasty things happen in the first book and (in my opinion) it took a couple of chapters to get into.  It is unfortunate that Stieg has since passed away (and there is a fair bit of consipracy about his death given he was a journalist who exposed extreme right wingers and pro Nazi) . 

 of course the first book is now a movie and I might have to take K.

The Uncommon Reader - Alan Bennet, anybody read this delightful novella about what happens when the Queen (of England) discovers a love of reading?  Worth the few hours it takes to read it.

As The Earth Turned Silver - Alison Wong.  A debut novel from a New Zealander writer, a beautiful told story set in Wellington at the turn of last centuary.  It is the tale of forbidden love (a Pakeha (caucasian)  widow and a Chinese man) that has tragic consequences (I cried).  It is picked to win something at the next NZ book awards by staff at my shop.

Three Cups of Tea by Greg Mortenson - a great read about an awesome man, it's good press for American's who have had a bad international rep for some years.   When George Bush was bombing Afghanistan, Greg was building schools in the poorest and most remote parts of Pakistan and Afghanistan, including schools for girls - and he is doing this with the help and support of the local villages (mostly).  This book really is an eye opener and I look forward to reading his sequel "Stones into Schools".

and last but not least by Patrick Ness, the first two books in the Chaos Walking series (young adult fiction that easily crosses into adult fiction), The Knife of Never Letting Go and the Ask and the Answer.   Imagine being a teenage boy and living in a small rural town where you could hear everybodies thoughts and everybody could hear your thoughts.  There are no woman either.  This is a book that is impossible to put down and as soon as I read it I had to read the sequel.  I can't wait for the third in the series which comes out in March 2010 (I think).

Merry Christmas everyone

sorry I've been away - some weeks ago someone dropped the laptop (though none of the teens in my home seem to know anything about it  ) and then a few weeks ago it gave up the ghost.  I wasn't expecting insurance to cover it but they did - yay!!   I have finally uploaded all my old data onto and it's ready to go again.  woohoo

I hope you all have a very merry christmas and a fabulous new year =)

Pohutukawa (Kiwi Christmas tree)

seriously if my daughter was anymore negative she would demateralise

but a glass of nice Pinot Noir and some chocolate santas makes it all better

I feel weird wishing everybody Happy Thanksgiving, coz a) we don't celebrate it here and b) it may have been great for the settlers but it lead to lots of misery for others...... 

As the parent of an indigenous child (even an extremely negative teen) I still feel sensitive to the suffering that colonisation has caused.

 I was trying to upload a  photo but kept getting 'error on page' msg and a pop up blank AnD window - what the?  More red wine is needed